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Summary/recap

Which is the cycle/process of gossip?
When you gossip you make a really big damage to a person and even if you say sorry the damage is made and even if you say sorry the damage is made and it would never erase of that person. Lets say if you crumple a paper and you try to put it back normal it can get descrumpled but never would be the same as it was before. So you you should think before you say something.

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How gossip damage friendship
Sofia Ayalde 26/05/12

Gossip can hurt your friendships in a number of ways. Some of these ways include:

• It will eventually get back to that person. The person who is being gossiped about will almost always hear that they are being talked about, and chances are they will also be told that it was you who was gossiping, if you were guilty of it.
• The friend will feel betrayed. If your friend has trusted you with a secret or with personal information, if they find out you have damage their trust and gossiped about it, they will feel betrayed by someone they thought was their friend. Once a trust in any type of relationship is damaged, it is very difficult to get it back.
• People will be suspicious of you. If you have gossiped about a friend, they will be less likely to go to you in times of need, for fear that you will tell others about their problems, or gossip about what you think their problems are caused by.
• You lose credibility with other friends. If you are gossiping to one friend about another, they will most likely think that if you are willing to gossip about another friend, then you will gossip about them as well. For that reason, they in turn will wonder what you're saying about them. They may also be less likely to tell you anything, even if you have never gossiped about them personally.
• The person you gossiped to may tell the person you are talking about. If you are gossiping about a person and spreading rumors or telling personal information to someone, they may very well go and tell the person you were talking about. This will create an instant conflict.

Even if you are not actively involved in the gossip, if you are in the group and not defending your friendo r the person gossiped about, you are still involved on the rumor or gossip.
The following are some ways you can avoid getting caught up in gossip:

• Ask yourself why you gossip
• Is it because you want attention?
• Are you using it as a way to bond with people?

Gossiping often gives people a false sense of power. They may feel like they are "in the know" by gossiping, or think that people will be more likely to listen to them if they have "juicy gossip." Once you know why, you can start correcting the root of the problem.

• Change the subject
• You can avoid getting caught up in gossip by changing the subject once it starts. Say something like, "I'd rather not talk about a situation I don't know anything about," and change the subject to something more positive.

• Act as if that person was standing right there

Before saying anything about someone else, ask yourself if you would feel comfortable knowing they could hear what you were saying, or if they were standing right beside you. If you wouldn't say it in front of them, don't say it in their back.

Usefulness
I think this article is useful for us to see how a gossip can damage a friendship that you could be trying hard to keep up, and that we should reflect, before we tell a gossip, and also to see that if you say somthing the most possible thing is that the victim is aware that it was you, and a conflict will happen.

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Daniela Mejía 15/05/12

Interview to Ricardo Pineda

Reflection

Aun no hemos aprendido lo que Miguel Ruiz escribió en su libro llamado "Los cuatro acuerdos" Dice: verificar y no suponer. En la medida de que nuestra humanidad poco a poco eleve su nivel de consciencia, el chisme ira desapareciendo y sera reemplazado unicamente por información verificada, suficiente, eficiente y oportuna.

Usefulness
This fact/information basically helps us to understand how gossip may be reduced, and understand that it isn't up to us, or what we do, but on the will of every individual.

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Daniela Mejía 12/05/12
Complemented by: Sofia Ayalde 26/05/12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1W4qPQaGi8g

The true cycle of gossip

Once a guy felt soo bad about gossiping that he decided that every time he said something bad about someone he would hammer a nail into a plank of wood, with time that plank was full of nails, so he decided to change, and every time he said something nice to another person he would take one nail out... and eventually the wood had 0 nails, so the kid was really happy. Then he showed it to his dad and he said "yes the wood has 0 nails, but... it stil have wholes on it" And that's exactly what happens with gossip, you can't take it back, you can't seal the whole, because the mean thing that you said, is still there and it would be there for ever. Also it shows how a gossip can change so much, that is impressive and that people are capable to suicide, for a gossip and how a little mistake can finish with a big embarassing and a horrible thing.
Usefulness
We used this for our action, we explained it and gave it as an example of what gossip can do, and how it can never be healed once it is out. This was very useful because the kids were very interested and they thought it was impacting.
Because is a clear example of gossip that leave you thinking and reflecting about it.

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How do we know gossip is always going to be bad?

Nicolas Carvajal, Juan Pablo Abadia and Sofia Ayalde 8/05/12

PREVIOUS KNOWLEDGE:

Gossip is always bad, because when there is good gossip, it is not called gossip; it is called social communication or facts. Gossip doesn`t exist when there is true information that it doesn`t affect people involved so it should not be harmful. One type of good gossip (social communication) is for building a community, eg. Maria Perez is sick, please donate blood in hospital Valle del Lili. So people will know what happen and can help.

And the other good effect of "good gossip" is that it can bring a new member to a group; so gossip can be inclusive. That means joining more people to the group and not excluding him her. But, what happens with the person gossiped about? He or she would never be part of the group. So we should be solidary and think about others.

There are many bad effects of gossip, for example it can create a mental or physical problems in people. For example: "Pepita is fat" so pepita can become anorexic. Also people get hurt by the misleadment of information because is something fake or a personal secret that nobody would like to revel it.